2. Spieltag/European Recap/3. Spieltag Preview

FC Schalke 04 - 1. FC Köln 5:1 (1:1)

After calling all three out by name in last week’s KickAbout, avid readers Klaas-Jan Huntelaar, Raul and Lewis Holtby responded with a clear riposte to your humble correspondent, ripping 4 goals in 17 minutes past Michael Rensing and the hapless group of defenders stiffs in front of him. Curiously this barrage occurred after the match itself started 10 minutes late(resulting from a stuck Schalke team bus when Köln manager Ståle Solbakken tried to park it in front of Rensing’s net) and a shock 0:1 lead in the 12th minute from pouting poser Lukas Podolski. Confused but undeterred by these tactics, Schalke eventually equalized right before halftime with an early Maria Himmelfahrt gift of a PK from Father Guido Sarducci Schiedsrichter Guido Winkelmann. Two goals and 180 seconds after the 2nd half whistle and Köln was done, with only some fancy entertainment from Raul and Huntelaar’s hat trick to liven up the final 40 minutes of play.

HJK Helsinki - FC Schalke 04(Europa League Qualification) 2:0 (1:0) After its solid Solbakken shellacking, Schalke traveled Thursday to Helsinki to try and dominate some more Norwegians Finns (aren’t all Scandinavians the same?). They made the trip without Raul, who was variously rumoured to be off to Blackburn (really?), PSG (slightly more plausible) or just home trying out some new tapas recipes. Looking lethargic, uninspired and without Raul and his home cooking, Schalke found itself instead swallowing a Pukki-Pukki platter in a 2:0 defeat that really wasn’t even that close. They’ll have two days to regroup before facing a hot Mainz team in its new stadium.

This week: 1. FSV Mainz 05 - FC Schalke 04 (Sun); 1. FC Köln - 1. FC Kaiserslautern

The Köln Kärnival Klöwns return home Saturday to host (almost) equally krappy Kaiserslautern.  With both clubs now 0-2 after being outscored by a combined 11-2 in the first two weekends, expect fireworks as they battle to avoid the early season Keller Krown. Expect Köln, without the services of both Rensing (knee) and Podolski (Turkish fever) to grab the Rote Lanterne with all hands.

Hamburger SV – Hertha BSC Berlin 2:2 (1:1)

Hamburg’s youngsters (avg. age 23.55) looked for solace at home after being flattened by the Prussian steamroller in the Westfalenstadion. Meanwhile Hertha, with a solid defense led by Bayern-castoffs Kraft, Lell and Ottl (the latter two München natives and all 3 products of the Bayern-Jugend) hoped to generate some offense against the struggling HSV Abwehr. The Berliners created several chances, only to be denied by the woodwork on 3 separate occasions. Two HSV goals against the run of play (including a fairly-given Foulelfmeter by Petric), however, put the visitors on their back boot and staring at a second straight defeat in the closing minutes. But in the 88th minute a well-timed header from Mijatovic defeated HSV coach Michael Oenning’s tactical substitutions of Jansen and Jarolim and earned Hertha a deserved point.

Next: Bayern München - Hamburger SV; Hannover 96 - Hertha BSC (Sun)

It only gets worse for Oenning’s players, who’ll face a struggling, but slowly (very slowly) improving Bayern in the Allianz Arena. Without several key players HSV can only hope a Bayern tired from their midweek clash with Zürich and without Mario Gomez may be vulnerable to a lucky counterattack.

It doesn’t get any better for Hertha, either. The jelly-filled doughnuts travel to Hannover to battle the in-form 96ers, fresh from a 2:1 defeat of Sevilla in the Europa League. Hertha will also hope for a post-victory letdown and more generous aluminum to earn at least a point against the Hannoveraner.

1. FC Nürnberg - Hannover 96 1:2 (0:2)

Hot Hannover kept rolling along this week, starting with 2 goals in the first 27 minutes and then holding on for a deserved away 3 points at the Frankenstadion easy-credit Stadion®. The Club made a match of it with a strong 2nd-half offensive, but found their attacks denied by a solid 96 back four and Hannover’s excellent young keeper Ron-Robert Zieler (recently called up to the Nationalelf). Injuries to Club stalwarts keeper Raphael Schäfer and Javier Pinola will only add to coach Dieter Hecking’s misery going forward.

Hannover 96 - FC Sevilla (Europa League Qualification) 2:1 (2:1) Hannover’s excellent run of form continued Thursday night, again with a well-deserved win over a strong Sevilla side in the 96er’s first European match in two decades. Despite a relatively uncharacteristic Steve Cherundolo mistake that led to Sevilla’s equalizer, Hannover rode an otherwise strong defensive performance and two well-timed goals from Jan Schlaudraff to the victory. Hannover looks to retain the upper hand in Sevilla next week in the return leg.

Next up: Borussia Dortmund - 1. FC Nürnberg; Hannover 96   -  Hertha BSC (Sun)

Injury-plauged Nürnberg head to the Westfalenstadion to face the Wrath of Klopp and a Dortmund side one expects to be well-motivated after their loss to FC Hopp. 96 meanwhile will attempt to keep their strong run going in a battle of opposite ends of the Tabelle, as Hertha coach Markus Babbel tries to build on their relatively-encouraging performance against an (admittedly-struggling) Hamburg side.

SC Freiburg – FSV Mainz 05 1:2 (0:0)

Mainz continued to recover from their difficult DFB-Pokal start (2:1 away extra-time win over 5th division SVN Zweibrücken) and surprising Europa League ouster at the hands of Romanian powerhouse Gaz Metan Medias (3:4 in a shootout) to remain atop the Tabelle with a hard-fought win in Freiburg. Both teams gave the assembled Black Forest faithful little to cheer about in a first-half snoozefest, but then woke up to supply a super second-half chock full of chances. Mainz made the better of theirs, taking a 2:0 lead within a 15-minute span before holding on and giving up the now-obligatory Cissé goal (shock!) in the final minute for the Sieg.

This week: Werder Bremen   -  SC Freiburg; 1. FSV Mainz 05 - FC Schalke 04 (Sun)

Freiburg make the long trek north to the Weserstadion still in search of their first win, which may be possible against a weak Bremen side that struggled to create chances against Leverkusen. Mainz, with an extra day of rest thanks to Schalke’s Scandavian sojourn, gets to head home to their sparkling new Coface-Arena before taking on the Königsblauen.

TSG 1899 Hoffenheim – Borussia Dortmund 1:0 (1:0)

And here it is, the Shocker der Woche! Or maybe not? Hoppenheim has made itself into quite a nuisance for BVB since arriving in the 1. Bundesliga in 2008, enjoying a 4-3-1 advantage over the 7-time Deutscher Meister. The Kraichgauer showed little respect for the reigning champions, taking the upper hand in the midfield from the opening whistle. New coach Holger Stanislawski’s tactics paid off early, courtesy of a 33-meter hammer free kick from Salihovic into the top left corner. Blessed with the early lead, the Hoppers held out with a compact defensive alignment, some superlative saves from Tom Starke and technical assistance from a “rogue employee” who neutralized the Dortmund fans with a bizarre audio attack scheme. Borussen Field Marshall Jürgen Klopp (semi-legitimately) blamed his squad’s sluggish play on the midweek international games, with Götzinho and Hummels having played 88 minutes against Brazil, and Kagawa returning from the Land of the Rising Sun where he scored 2 of Japan’s 3 goals in their victory over South Korea.

Next up: FC Augsburg   -  1899 Hoffenheim; Borussia Dortmund   -  1. FC Nürnberg

Hoffenheim hope to capitalize on their big win against the promotees in Augsburg, whose confidence is increasing after earning two hard fought draws in their first two games. Dortmund look to have an easier time back within the Westfalenstadion’s friendly confines, against Der Club struggling with new injury problems on top of losing several key players in the off-season.

VfL Wolfsburg – FC Bayern 0:1 (0:0)

Klopp’s komplaints fell on deaf ears in Wolfsburg, where Bayern managed to eke out a lucky victory against Saddam’s minions despite 7 DFB starters, 5 of whom played the full 90 against Brazil. Magath, however, had good grounds to gripe about no video replay after Helmes’ perfectly good goal was disallowed by Knut Kircher. Neither team looked particularly proficient, especially on offense, and a draw was probably a fair result. Late substitute and dauerläufer Ivica Olic had other ideas, though, and his 91st minute sprint down the left side combined with an excellent pass from Ribery to the oncoming Luis Gustavo resulted in a well-delivered 16-meter drive that split 2 defenders and richocheted of Benaglio’s hand into the left corner. Game over, with the Münchener the not altogether deserved victors.

FC Bayern - FC Zürich (CL-Qualification) 2:0 (1:0) Still not superlative, but much more deserved, was Bayern’s victory over their Swiss guests in the Allianz Arena on Wednesday. With Robben back in the starting lineup to complement Ribery for the first time since May 7, Bayern immediately put the visitors under pressure with an 8th minute header from Schweinsteiger off a Robben cross for the 1:0 lead. The Münchener showed more creativity and variability in their offense, with “Robbery” switching from left to right and back again often to complicate Zürich’s defensive marking. Unfortunately despite creating more chances, the finishing, especially from last year’s Bundesliga Torkönig Gomez, left much to be desired. Missed chance after missed chance resulted in no lack of “Meine Güte Junge!” cries of dismay from B5 aktuell (Bayern’s home radio station) announcers Hans-Peter Pull and Edgar Andres. A good result, and with Zürich offering little in the way of offensive capability, Bayern looks a good bet to make the Champions League group stage to continue their dream of making the Final in München next May.

Up next: Bayern - HSV (Saturday); Gladbach - Wolfsburg (Friday)

Borussia Mönchengladbach - VfB Stuttgart 1:1 (0:0)

In a matchup of two clubs doing well to erase the bad memories of last season’s near-relegation, the Schwaben traveled to Borussia Park with confidence after their 3:0 beatdown of Schalke in Week 1. Equally confident the Borussen, having defeated old nemesis Bayern in München, led to plenty of action. 19-year old keeper Marc-André ter Stegen picked up right where he left off in the Allianz Arena, making save after spectacular save to deny VfB the lead. For the Schwaben, also continuing his strong start in the double-pivot alongside Kuzmanovic was new boy “Billy” Kvist, referee Gräfe’s decision to award a PK to Gladbach after Kvist’s questionable contact with Marco Reus notwithstanding. Indeed it was Kvist’s cross that Christian Gentner headed back across the goal for a classic, perfectly time run and goal by Cacau for the equalizer. Fair result for both squads.

This week: Gladbach - Wolfsburg (Friday); VfB Stuttgart - Bayer Leverkusen

The Borussen will enjoy another home game against “Die Wölfe”, who are understandably chapped at their unlucky loss to Bayern and ready for revenge. Gladbach’s defense (without the suspended Brouwers) and the stellar early-season showing from ter Stegen stand in Wolfsburg’s way, however, die Fohlen will need to generate more chances and execute better in front of goal to come up with their second win of the season. VfB will return to their new home with the hope that their makeshift central defense (Tasci, Delpierre, Niedermeyer & Bikacic all injured to varying degrees) will continue to hold against a Werkself still struggling for offensive firepower. 

1. FC Kaiserslautern – FC Augsburg 1:1 (0:1)

Another week, another goal for Sascha Mölders, now with 3 in his first two Bundesliga matches. Mölders’ excellent run and shot led to a 9th minute 0:1 lead for the visiting Schwaben, who held on for another deserved point, thanks in no small part to some fantastic goalkeeping from Simon Jenztsch. A back and forth and entertaining Schußfest am Betzenberg between two clubs that fought hard and may ultimately rue dropped points as they face tougher opposition deeper into the season.

Saturday: 1. FC Köln - 1. FC Kaiserslautern; FC Augsburg - 1899 Hoffenheim

Bayer Leverkusen - Werder Bremen 1:0 (0:0)

Big Pharma makes a Big Comeback: what a difference a week makes. After both clubs were unceremoniously dumped from the DFB-Pokal by lower level opposition, last week Werder looked relatively Dortmundesque in their dismissal of K’town, while Bayer lost another keeper and their opening match to Mainz. No such problems this week for the Pharmaceuticals, as new 19 year-old keeper “Jay” Leno had little to do against a Bremen side happy to park 10 men behind the ball and that struggled to create even a couple of goal chances.  Still, the Werkself left it late, with only a billiard shot goal from Kadlec off the inside of the post in the 85th minute to secure the W. Note to Thomas Schaaf: if you want to break your streak of 8 games against Leverkusen without a victory, perhaps the Charlie Brown uniforms aren’t the best good luck charm…

This Saturday: Werder Bremen - SC Freiburg;  VfB Stuttgart - Bayer Leverkusen

 Bis zum nächsten mal……

Auf geht’s ins Stadion!